Craig Schluterman.

I decided to do some research behind this “Craig” character before I agreed to give him my sister’s hand in marriage.  I think everyone will be interested to see what my research has exposed:

The name Craig is of Scottish and Gaelic origin, and its meaning is “rock, rocky“. Comes from the word “crag“. Also originally a Scottish surname. The name is now popular in the English-speaking world.

All I know is that when we played backyard football, the last word(s) I would use to describe Craig is Rock or Rocky…more like Jello or Jello-ee or soft or softy.  Not rock or rocky.

Kyle = Rock.  Craig = Pudding.

Unfortunately, there is more:

The name Schluterman derived from the Middle Low German term “Schlutter” meaning “doorkeeper” It is supposed that the name was originally occupational for the keeper of supplies of a large household (or a single-wide mobile home).

Just one further point:  Hasn’t he (Craig) always told us that he is studying to be a vet?  Kerrin, how many years is the Carnegie-Mellon Masters program in Doorkeeping?  is that a 6 or 8 year program?

I think we have all learned some valuable lessons here.

You can thank me later Lauren. Phew, that was a close one.

7 thoughts on “Craig Schluterman.

  1. I, for one, am very grateful for your research Nolan. We were THIS close to having a Jell-O-y doorkeeper for a brother. That would have been quite the stain on the Sheldon family fabric.

  2. 5-7 years, usually. But I wouldn’t be surprised if it took “him” more like 10-12 years.

    I like Jello. I eat people like Craig for breakfast, and then I make them open the door for me.

  3. Nolan I dont want to have to do this, but you’ve pushed me too far. Let me tell you what I found out about your wife – now thats its too late!!!

    “Alexis is a masculine name. It is of Russian, German, French, English or ancient Greek origin.
    ‘Alexis’ is the male derivation of ‘Alexius’. It is an acient Greek name with the meaning of “helper” or “defender”.

    So lets just remember that your wife is your defender as it is of no surprise to anyone in our family that you are weak and unable to defend yourself. Weak. Weak. Weak. At least Craig has the strength to hold open doors… big heavy ones.

    Nolan: “Noble – Feminine Form of Nolan. Also Can Be a Diminutive of Finola: Fair Shoulders”

    Im going to marry Craig anyway you weak, defenseless fair shouldered person.

  4. Ya, Nolan take that!! You fair shouldered person. I would never rely solely on my wife to defend me. I am a rock, a manly rock.

  5. KERR
    Gender: MASCULINE
    Usage: Scottish, English (Rare)
    From a Scottish surname which was derived from a place name meaning “rough wet ground” in Old Norse.

    (they didn’t have Kerrin)

    I am rough and wet! Mwahahahaha – like a friggin sea monster.

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